Accepting Yourself as a Wedding Filmmaker

Realizing This After 8 (9 now) of Filming Wedding

Sometimes, the life of a wedding filmmaker or general wedding vendor gets romanticized. On social media, we see them at parties every weekend, or even multiple times a week. That's what drew me in in the beginning– being surrounded by fun and exciting times while getting to flex my own creativity in art and business.

But today I want to talk about some of the behind-the-scenes mentality that doesn't really get spoken about: Acceptance. Accepting who you are.

Hi everyone, if you're new here, my name is Aaron and I'm a wedding filmmaker in Ontario, Canada.

I grew up in a fairly large city area. Not the dead centre of urban life, but in a very generic suburban area where I could easily make my way down to the busy downtown life. This was especially true for me while studying in university. Living like everyone else was because I thought that's what we had to do. Trying new foods, going to different bars, keeping up to date with music and fashion.

9 years ago (8 years from the video uploaded above) I shot my first wedding, and I loved it.

I went all in and still to this day only see myself working in this field.

But along the way, I was easily swayed by many things. Lifestyle choices. Like thinking I need to prioritize travel in my life. Or prioritize work things, like marketing and accounting. Or prioritizing clothes, an image, friendships, family, food.

And these are all things I think we should still cultivate in our lives, but at the same time, we need to know when those priorities are actually someone else's priorities.

Examples are like thinking traveling should be the number one goal when in actuality you're a smalltown homebody. Or when you hear about the latest fashion trends or cultural news, maybe you think you need those shoes or need to watch the game, but actually you just want to read a good book.

As a traveling wedding vendor, I understand I can be easily influenced by the extreme varieties of people and lifestyles I come across in the world. Like high-life businessmen, or nomadic artists, or family-oriented doctors as examples.

But only after working in this field for 8 years (now 9), I am just now starting to accept myself and know that I don't need what others prioritize.

On my YouTube and instagram page, you'll see that a lot of my work is very energy intensive. I love big weddings with big energy because those are the types of wedding films I love creating. But that doesn't mean I'm a high-energy man. In fact, I think what we're attracted to is what we lack.

And I'm just now starting to accept that who I am, my personality, lacks the motivation to want to be an extremely extroverted outgoing individual. Don't get me wrong, I'll always love being around my close friends and family or dancing at weddings, but it's crucial for me to have my own space and time alone.

Acceptance.

Accept who you are,
accept what you need,
and accept the boundaries you have for yourself.

Maybe right now you're influenced by your friends who are starting to travel the world again. Or maybe you feel envy for the family who choose to live in the fun and exciting city. Or maybe tiktok says you need to watch certain movies or read specific books. Maybe that is you, but maybe it's not.

Take some time today to reset your influences.

What if you woke up today without remembering anything from your past. You have no obligations, you have no financial responsibilities or work tasks to complete. You don't have social media so you don't know what everyone else is doing.

What would you do and why?

There's a feeling in my stomach I'm starting to get close with and becoming more aware of. Actually there's two stomach feelings I get. The first one isn't the nicest, it is that opening gut feeling on the right side of my stomach that feels pain, shame or sadness. But then there is a warmer feeling just above that which I experience when I feel at peace. Happy. 

I get this peaceful feeling when I think about the tranquility I can easily attain. I get this feeling when I'm with close friends and family I can be myself around. I get this feeling when I picture myself in the future with loved ones and loving experiences.

I love walks alone. I love driving with a wandering open mind. I love reading. Biking with good music. And I love resting in my own space to make sense of all my experiences.

Just like editing a wedding film, you need time to go over all the sensory information you've taken in during the day. And only after alone time can you come to a movie-worthy perspective of what the world has shown you.

So, I love my big parties and large groups of people. I grew up around that and need a familial circle in my life. But I know I also need a loving space of my own to nurture myself as a person and my consciousness as a creative.

To all my fellow wedding filmmakers and photographers out there:
this is your sign that if you cultivate your own mind, skill, and craftsmanship, you do not need to stress about the latest tiktok trends.

The greatest friendship and investment asset you will have is with yourself. Take care of your mind, spirit and body, and the people around you will feel that care from you too.

Who knows, maybe you'll end up finding a cozy home in the mountains for you to befriend your thoughts and shelter your loved ones.

Oh and also to catch up on your backlog of wedding edits

Until next time,

Aaron